Why We Must Face Our Emotions to Heal

Spiritual bypassing—what is it, really? At its core, it’s denial, avoidance, and repression dressed up in spiritual language. It’s when we use spiritual concepts or practices to sidestep uncomfortable emotions or unresolved wounds.

Here’s the hard truth: when we suppress our emotions, it doesn’t just stay in the realm of the mind. The body keeps score. Unprocessed pain and bitterness can manifest as physical health issues over time. Even ancient scripture recognized this connection between emotions and health, as Proverbs 17:22 wisely observes: “A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.” Modern science now backs this up, showing how chronic emotional suppression can weaken the immune system, disrupt sleep, and even contribute to serious illnesses.

Take anger, for example. It’s a normal and necessary human emotion—one that has helped us survive and protect ourselves in moments of danger. Anger can serve as a motivator for action, pushing us to set boundaries or fight for justice. But here’s what many don’t realize: anger is often a secondary emotion. Beneath it, there’s usually something deeper—grief, fear, shame, or even profound sadness.

What happens when we refuse to confront these underlying emotions? We might bury them temporarily, but they never truly disappear. Instead, they linger in the shadows, influencing our thoughts, relationships, and physical well-being. Repression isn’t healing; it’s a time bomb.

So, what’s the alternative? Healing requires us to stop running from our pain and turn toward it with compassion. This doesn’t mean facing it alone. Whether it’s with a trusted friend, a trauma-informed life coach, or a skilled therapist, we need safe spaces where we can process our feelings without judgment. By allowing ourselves to feel and express the pain we’ve buried, we release its grip on our hearts and bodies.

Let’s stop using spirituality as a way to avoid doing the work and start using it as a tool for authentic transformation.