Wisdom from Hillary L. McBride:

“On the journey to heal, we can often feel worse before we feel better.

That doesn’t mean it will always feel that way, but it can be so discouraging when we finally take the step to go to therapy, ask for help, and face what is inside.

It usually happens because we start making contact with the memories, sensations, longings, and feelings that were unfelt while we were surviving. Now that there is space, they make themselves known, and it hurts.

Sometimes we call this “back draft” in therapy. The challenge of finally facing the pain inside is different than having misattuned and unskillful therapy or support, where more injury happens and we are further traumatized.

But I want you to know that if you have started feeling again, and it hurts, you’re not alone. Soon you will also be able to feel pleasure, joy, connection, love, vibrancy, passion, and ease in your body.

With the backlog of traumas attended to, It will be easier to know when you’ve been hurt or need something, and trust if what you’re feeling is about the past or present. And all of this will make it easier to trust yourself, and risk more connection. Because you know how to feel, you will also be able to feel into the goodness of that- of trusting yourself – and it won’t just be an idea, but a sensation in your body, a real something.”